What do you do when your friends turn their backs and it seems like your world is falling apart?

NOTE: This post has been edited to protect the parties involved.

This is the question my little brother must be asking himself now.  This weekend he learned a hard life lesson, something everyone will experience - sometimes your friends aren't who you think they are.

My little brother is the sweetest guy you'll ever meet. He is kind, funny,trusting, hardworking, compassionate and fiercly loyal. He really is one of the nicest people I have ever met. This weekend his friends took advantage of his good nature and my family's hospitality - by setting some of our belongings on fire while they stayed at our cottage with him. Outraged yet? Me too. I need to get this out so feel free to listen/read or just give me a pat on the head.

It's been tradition for the past few years that my friends and I take over the cottage for the weekend and have a little party. There are always rules and it usually ends up being a GREAT time. Bro turned 20 this summer so he thought it would be a great idea to get some guys together and head to the cottage on his own for the first time. He gathered up a few of his friends from football (he's known these guys for the past 10 years) and one of his best friends (whom he's known since birth) and headed to the cottage. Everything went well on Satuday night and the boys decided to make fries and Bob headed to bed.

Flash forward to Sunday, at 1:30p.m. I get a call from my mother as I'm heading to visit my Grandfather. Dan answers and tells me to pull over. I got a little nervous and pulled over. Got on the phone with mom and she says "Something happened at Keji (the cottage) and he (brother) needs you to go over. There was a fire. No one was hurt but his friend's set it and he doesn't know what to do." I knew it was going to take 2 hours to get there but Dan and I hightailed it over. Dad left at the same time and we met him there.

Turns out during the night some of the boys started a fire in the flower garden in front of the house. They threw in our toaster,a blender, the bed box, 2 lamps, Bro's 2 PS3 controllers, a video game, some of my Dad's reference books, a guest book/journal that we write in each time we're there and some other random stuff. Then they lied to Bro and tried to tell him that someone broke in and did it. Bro told them they were full of shit, to get out of the house and he went to find cell service. It took him a 20 mintue drive to call my mom, obviously upset and ask her what to do. He then headed back to the house to see that they hadn't left. They laughed when he tired to kick them out. Eventually they left. Then we were called and headed there.

When I got there Bro was so upset. He was devastated that his friends burnt up our guest book. This book was full of visits, stories and memories that we'd had there since 2007. This cottage has been around since the 1960's and there are books dating back to the first visit. He was upset they lied to him. He was upset that guys he'd know since he was 10 betrayed him. But the thing that hurt him the most is that one of his best friends wouldn't tell him what happened, lied to him, laughed at him and basically betrayed his trust.

I really didn't know what to do. We helped him clean up and we had a chat about friendships and how they evolve. I told him "Well buddy, sometimes people grow up to be asshats." He thought it was funny, and I kind of meant it to be, but honestly it's the truth. He knows the things don't matter, and no one was hurt but he feels so betrayed. And I hurt for him.

I have all these things I want to say to these assholes. I have all this anger in me and no outlet for it. Mom called the boys parents and, even though most are 19-20, they are all in deep shit. We're not pressing charges for the damage - even though we probably could and we're not asking for an appology. We just want those kids gone. But Bro hurts. He can't believe someone would do this to him and neither can I, really.

I just don't know what else to do. I really feel like if I saw these boys I might lose my shit. I really just want to scream and then I want to take all of my little brother's pain for him...he's usually such a happy guy - I hate to see him hurt like that.




What right did these little shit-heads have to come into OUR HOUSE and destroy our belongings?! What right did they have to hurt the nicest person I've ever met - someone who would rather run himself ragged than disappoint someone else?! I have no words for these selfish, rude, hurtful little fuckers except this: Karma is a bitch and someday when you need something really badly and you have no one to turn to you'll realize that you have destroyed the trust and friendship of one of the best people you've ever had the privilege to meet. You'll be on your own and he will be surrounded by better friends, a family that loves him and people that care.

Cha...cha...changes!

So recently I've decided to do an over-haul of my life.  I need to stop living in the "I'm in university/poor student" mode and move on to adult mode.  The first part of this process is personal:  update my skincare and beauty regimen, revamp my fitness routines, overhaul our eating habits and really spend some time on our relationship as a couple and our relationships with family/friends.  The second part: financial, but we'll talk about that another time.

A few weeks ago I asked some friends for recommendations on skincare/beauty regimens.  While this may not seem like it should be the first step in my over-haul, I believe that the better you feel about yourself the more confident you will be and the more you will accomplish.  So I set off getting recommendations and trying new products.  It's only been about a week but my skin is already noticeably clearer and softer.  I have less pimples and find myself wearing less make-up.  Step one is in progress!

Step two is my fitness.  While I have been actively trying to lose weight/get fit/ be active for the past 5(ish) years I've never pushed this hard.  Before it was to the gym once or twice a week.  Now I've upped it.  Twice a week minimum( I try for 3x a week), swimming/yoga/biking/something stretchy/cardio at least twice a week and walking the dogs at least once a week.  I've only been on this new kick for 2 weeks but I'm already feeling better about myself and my body.  I'm feeling more active, more alert and better about myself.

Step three overhauling our menu.  Dan and I eat pretty well.  We limit the sweets/junk and fast food but we know when to treat ourselves.  What I've noticed recently, though, is that our portions are off.  We can't usually finish what we have and for the longest time I couldn't figure out why.  Now I understand.  I used to cook for three, when we had a room mate, now I'm only cooking for 2 but I haven't cut back any of my recipes or done much to modify portions.  So step three is scaling them back.  Oh, and adding more veggies.  You can never have too many veggies;)

So the final step, for today, is our relationship.  Dan and I have a wonderful relationship.  He's my best friend.  *insert girly sigh here* But it's because we work at it.  We recently agreed that work was stressing us both out so we've made our minds up that once a week will be date night.  During date night there is only us.  We can do whatever we want - go out, stay in, cook, sleep, play video games, BUT we must do it together.  We've also started taking more vacations.  I'm not talking to far away exotic lands but even just to the Valley for the weekend or the cottage.  It's been really great to get out and explore with him and it's given us lots of time to chat.

So there it is, the first half of my new life plan.

Made any big life changes lately?

Date of the deed...

So it's happening - the contract has been signed, the deposit has been paid, the venue has been booked and the date has been set. Sunday September 4, 2011 Dan and I will be getting married!!!


Please feel free to squee for me.

Okay, enough squeeing. Here's some pictures that our coordinator has sent.

This is what the ceremony set-up would be. Obviously not pink...I am not a pink wedding girl BUT the set-up is like this...

I love  that there`s that big chandiler in the center, where our vows will be said.  And the arch is lovely, although I don`t know if it`s the venue`s or not.  Something to look into...

Anyways, this would be the basic set up of the tables. We're thinking red table squares and napkins.

The centrepieces are tall square vases. The venue provides floating candles and tea lights so my BFF and I are going to go rock gathering around beaches in the area and use them in the bottom with a single  flower, water, a floating candle and maybe tea lights around. Similar to....

But with some rocks in the bottom and probably not so much a wispy flower. I almost picture a Gerber daisy or bright yellow (small) sunflower but I don't know if either of those would work.

Thoughts?

So um..

So I'm a slacker...I know I know! I've been slack but hey kids, big news....I"M GETTING MARRIED!

Dan and I had decided to go away to celebrate our 4 year anniversary. We went to the Diby Pines in Digby, NS. We were in our room watching TV the first afternoon there, because it was rainy, and Dan got up to mess around with something in his bag. I kept watching tv and just hanging out on the bed. I could feel him standing behind me so I turned around and he was staring out the window. I looked at him then at the window then at him and I said "What are you doing?" I figured he was looking at a boat coming in the harbour. He wasn't. He immediately dropped to one knee and pulled out a ring box. He looks at me and simply said "Will you marry me?" The first thought that ran thru my head was "OMG! Is he serious?! REALLY?!"" But I didn't say it instead I screamed OMG YES and jumped on him!! We kissed and hugged and it was WONDERFUL!!